Cheer If You Can, Zip It If You Must

Feb 15, 2022 | Co-Parenting, Family Law, Firm News

Sometimes great family law advice comes from unexpected sources.

In the most recent edition of Vogue, Kim Kardashian dropped an important truth bomb about the best way to deal with an ex for the sake of your children:

“You could be so hurt or angry at your ex, but I think in front of the kids, it always has to be ‘Your dad’s the best,’ ” she explains. “Make sure you are your co-parent’s biggest cheerleader, no matter what you’re personally going through.”

This is true. In a perfect world co-parents would be able to set aside their personal beefs and come together for the sake of their children. They’d say wonderful things about each other, smile at each other, and be each other’s most prominent supporters in order to set a wonderful example for the kids.

In practice, we know that this is not always possible. Some wounds remain salty for years or even decades after a split and take a long time to heal, if they ever heal at all. If that sounds like a wound you are all too familiar with, we offer you this: cheer if you can, zip it if you must.

It’s that simple. If you don’t have anything nice to say about your ex, don’t say anything at all. At the bare minimum, avoid venting about your ex in front of the kids or in public venues such as social media. Not only does doing so create tension for your kids – they love both of you after all – it exposes you to accusations of causing parental alienation.

No matter what differences you have, keep the focus on the one thing you agree on: you both want what is best for your children and would never do anything to harm them.